My traditional Super Bowl Sunday quote. Now we can add legalized pot to the mix!

If professional sports and showbiz celebrity have become the secular religion of the United States, the Super Bowl would be its high mass and Taylor Swift our Virgin Mary.  It combines both celebrity and sports in one huge pagan spectacle of bread and circuses. I was never a sports fan, having been raised in a family where sports were a nonentity, and never picking up the fan habit later on. It just wasn't in my genetic coding. 

I have only been to one Super Bowl party in my entire life, and that was in Detroit when I was a real estate agent/white collar criminal, and my broker hosted it at his palatial Bloomfield Hills mansion. The only thing more obnoxious and irritating than a room full of hyper, type A real estate agents are drunk ones in Detroit Lions football jerseys watching the Super Bowl. Plus, they all had deep psychological anger issues because the Lions have yet to make it to a Super Bowl. I remember one of our more intoxicated, top producing, jersey clad lady agents screaming at the TV during the whole game. It was quite disturbing to me. I found having a woman acting more manly than me to be emasculating. Ever since that day I am repelled by any woman I see in a football jersey, even that perky, cute, and vivacious Taylor Swift, and avoiding seeing her is becoming nearly impossible. 

However, there is one thing I do love about the Super Bowl that I have actually turned into a tradition. I always go on a hike to places that would otherwise be crowded on a Sunday. That is the one day you are assured of peace and quiet in the great outdoors. I just always make sure I get back home before the game ends and all the drunks hit the road. But, if you are viewing the Super Bowl, enjoy in good cheer, and have a scoop of guacamole on me.....


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